On Hindsight

[Elizabeth Halliwell]

It had been thirteen years to the day since she last got to properly meet face to face with her cousin. Liz's dad and Ellen's mom were siblings and for a while, the two families were a strong unit. When Ellen was born, Liz thought it was the best thing in the world since she didn't have any younger siblings, especially one that was a girl. They were close.

And then Ellen's parents split up and somehow, to Phillip Banks, that meant the families could no longer be on speaking terms. Ellen's mom moved away and Phillip brought Ellen far away from Liz's family. And Liz lost her best friend.

Liz, of course, tried to find all means of communication and every time she found one, she was rejected. Until recently. Ellen accepted Liz's friend request on Facebook and even though they rarely actually speak, Liz never gave up and kept trying to meet with Ellen.

Today, she had had enough of the rejection. She had a day off and she wanted to spend it with her oldest best friend. It wasn't too hard to track Ellen down, especially since she had long since moved away from her dad.

On hindsight, Liz should have realised that what she was doing was bordering on psychotic. She was stalking someone who clearly did not want anything to do with her. If she were a guy, she would have been slapped with so many restraining orders. But while she was driving downtown, all she thought about was meeting her cousin finally after a very long period of separation.

As she knocked on the door of Ellen's apartment, it briefly occurred to her that Ellen wasn't at home. With a small shrug, she knocked anyway.

[Ellen Banks]

It took a lot of mental fortitude for Ellen to press that little “Accept friend request” button. Far more then it really should have been, after all she hasn’t seen Elizabeth for a VERY very long time and there was a very good reason for that. Or so she was told as a child, it was her father’s second wife that THAT particular brance of the family came from.So once the divorce went through, he thought it was best to cut off ALL contact with that family. That was how he worked, bled women dry and once he got bored it was time to hit the showers.



Elizabeth in particular, Father was very particular about. He never liked that cheery platinum haired child, she was a wild child. The Halliwells were a very liberal family and little Elizabeth was treated like a princess who could do no wrong and he didn’t like the way Ellen seemed to gravitate towards her. She was TROUBLE he told Ellen on several occasions and she wasn’t to go near her or even speak to her.



...And like with everything else Ellen submitted.



She has not spoken to Elizabeth for several years and she preferred to keep it that way, if her father found out it wasn’t worth thinking about.



So when the knock came on the door of her house she had no reason to expect anything, only tutting to herself, as she was once again distracted from brushing her hair as she slowly undid the latch and slowly opened the door

[Elizabeth Halliwell]

When the door opened, Liz's grin brightened tenfold and her arms flew out to wrap around the younger woman, immediately squeezing the life out of her. Squealing and jumping up and down, her words jumbled into one long gibberish sentence.

"Oh my God, you look amazing! I've missed you! Oh my God you've grown up so much! I can't believe it!"

And without even asking, Liz stepped into the apartment and dislodged herself from Ellen and brought the big tote bag she had into the kitchen, carefully depositing it on the counter.

Muffled clinks and crackling could be heard coming from the bag before she turned back to Ellen, her open smile wide and excited. "Hi!"

[Ellen Banks]

Ellen never stood a chance. All she had time to do was let her eyes widen in surprise before she was assaulted by blond hair and arms wrapped around her, instantly Bell tensed right up, in surprise and slight pain being gripped and crushed so tight by Elizabeth’s embrace, feeling like she was in the coils of a boa constrictor.


At first’s Ellen original instinct was to push Elizabeth off, she hated being touched. Hated it. Especially being hugged so close and she could already feel her skin crawl….but soon began to relax into it just a little bit, She really couldn’t explain it….The warmth combined with the old familiar lavender scent was so….familar…...like hearing a song for the first time since you were a kid. It brought back mental images and nostalgic memories and that was strangely pacifying Ellen…


And….Then just like that Elizabeth broke off and the spell was broken and Ellen was brought back to reality blinking in surprise not quite believing this was actually happening….She looked...Good, great even, even if that really shouldn’t be considered a surprise, she saw Elizabeth in magazines all of the time but...to see her up close, yeah she looked great.


She didn’t like being taken off her guard like this nor the brief window of vulnerability she was experiencing her mouth opening and closing repeatedly lost for words, until eventually…


“What are you doing here?! You know I’m not meant to see you!”

[Elizabeth Halliwell]

Ellen's response was something she had anticipated but it still surprised Liz. So much that she almost regretted coming here. Almost.

"What he doesn't know won't hurt him and besides, you can't tell me you haven't missed me. We were best friends, Ellen!"

[Ellen Banks]

The more time passed and the more that Ellen got used to the fact that yes, despite all logic Elizabeth was here. The more she began to calm herself the more she collected herself and slate that queer sense of excitement that was currently building up in her stomach and put her walls up forcing her face into a more mature expression reminding herself that she wasn’t nine years old anymore.



Ellen frowned a little shaking her head and rubbing her hands through her hair “Oh no no. don’t do that “What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him” line might have worked when I was nine, but not now.” Glad she was trying to establish dominance “How did you even find me?”

[Elizabeth Halliwell]

She saw the momentary flash of the young girl she knew and hope blossomed in her. When it went away, Liz had to wonder what exactly her former uncle did to make Ellen so closed off like this.

But Liz was an optimist. Crazily so in fact. She was also stupidly determined to have Ellen accept that she was here to stay.

"I have friends." She grinned before shaking her head. "Ellen, it's me. Lizzie. You don't have to be so...rigid."

[Ellen Banks]

What in the world did Elizabeth expect? Ellen would squee in delight once she showed up at her front door unannounced? That she would instantly revert into a child like mindset just by looking at her? Did she think they’d be up all night Ellen hiding behind a pillow as they watch scary movies? She was grown woman now,



You think she’d grown up a little in the last twelve years.



Now, that the shock was moving off her in waves it was instead becoming something irritated folding her arms over her chest and her eyes furrowed together in a frown "oh I assure you this is be being down right chipper….”

[Elizabeth Halliwell]

Sighing, Liz looked at Ellen for a moment, studying her younger cousin, trying to find even a trace of who she used to be when they were younger and found nothing.

"I thought the reception would be a little warmer." She said softly before plastering a huge smile on her face, one that hid the mix of confusing emotions bubbling just under the surface. Liz took a deep breath and walked over to the door. "I can tell when I'm not wanted so...I just thought you would like to know that I'm around. If you need anything."

Liz turned around to face Ellen one more time, the smile still rigid on her face. "Don't be a stranger."

[Ellen Banks]

Despite her rather impressive poker face she had learned to maintain over the last few years, there was confliction and confusion behind her glare instantly there was something...strong, powerful, instinctive inside that wanted to call out to her, ask her to stay.



...But Ellen knew that she couldn;t.



She just couldn’t…….



Ellen simply stared as Liz left the room….once the door closed and silent was palpable...she simply sat there staring into space